Embedded Files
X-COPS “XCAB” EP
X-COPS “XCAB” EP
By Dr. Abner Mality
Talk about police brutality, X-COPS dole out enough beatings on this mini-LP to make the George Floyd case seem like a shoving match. I thought these fuzz were busted and behind bars forever after the passing of their commanding officer, Dave Brockie aka Oderus Urungus of GWAR. As usual, though, nobody’s out of action forever and now this goon squad containing members of RIGOR MORTIS, DARKEST HOUR and GWAR is back on the beat for this brief disk.
Calling X-COPS an out and out metal band might be pushing things. They seem to lean a bit more to the “raw rock” and punk side of things, but they do occasionally have a metal bite. One thing’s for sure, “XCAB” is extremely offensive and in your face with police-themed bad taste. The current insultingly bad version of GWAR couldn’t touch this with a nightstick. When you’ve got a song like “Kinderhardened” about school shootings and cops dropping kids with guns, that crosses a lot of red lines. So I will give them credit for sticking to an aggressively disgusting lyrical bent. Plus, there’s plenty of cursing and samples featuring bad cops in action.
The music? “We’re The Pigs” is raunch n roll on the simple and dirty side, the aforementioned “Kinderhardened” is pure buzzsaw punk at its catchiest, while “Conflict Management” is easily the most metallic tune, with a crunchy grind. Vocals are chalked up to X-Sherriff Tubb Tucker, X-Biker Biff Buff and a guy called “Zipper Pig”. As you can see, there are plenty of X-COPs to go around and I get the impression this is more of a fun project than an actual band.
There’s a raucous cover of THE POLICE’s “Next To You” that ends in pure cacophony and then things wrap up with the blazing fast but rather thin sounding “Light ‘Em Up”, which is about the Waco Siege.
“XCAB” is a brief but potent trip to the paddy wagon, where you will take a short trip that will still leave you nursing bruises. PROTEST AND SURVIVE!
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