EMBRYONIC AUTOPSY – “Prophesies of the Conjoined”

by Thor

“Prophesies of the Conjoined” is the debut album of the self-described OSBDM outfit EMBRYONIC AUTOPSY. While the band is new, its members have been playing metal of one sort or another for decades in their other bands. So, EMBRYONIC AUTOPSY is a supergroup of sorts, featuring vocalist Tim King (OPPRESSOR), guitarist/bassist/keyboardist Scott Roberts (ex-O T E P), and drummer Arnaud Krakowka. Not only that, but the album features guest spots by a murderers’ row of death metal luminaries including James Murphy (DEATH, OBITUARY, TESTAMENT), Terrance Hobbs (SUFFOCATION), and Doc Coyle (GOD FORBID).

That’s an impressive list of ingredients. So, how’s the meal taste?

Well…EMBRYONIC AUTOPSY’s band name and song titles are a little bit of a red herring. These guys play a style that’s arguably death metal adjacent, but it’s most definitely not brutal death metal. It’s mostly slow and mid-tempo modern metal with Tim King doing a version of his guttural vocals on top of it. It’s possible that all the nonmusical elements surrounding this album got my hopes unrealistically high, but aside from a few passages in a few songs, there’s not a lot here musically that really works for me. And on some tracks the vocals drift distractingly off key which is just baffling (yes, guttural vocals have to be “in the right key,” just like purdy ones do).

According to the band, “Prophesies of the Conjoined” is “…a concept album based on the theory of aliens visiting and helping to teach the Egyptian and Mayan cultures by furthering their technology. It would not be until centuries later that a spaceship crash in Roswell, New Mexico, would give scientists actual life forms to study. The DNA of these alien life forms were combined with human DNA to create alien/human hybrids. Although successfully spliced and kept alive, these hybrids were abominations of nature and soon turned against humanity.”

Maybe these human/alien hybrids just don’t care for our music? Anyway, your voracious reviewer really wanted to like this one, Wormsters. Unfortunately, it was not to be.