"Not for the Squeamish"

By Dr. Abner Mality

Greetings, humanoids! Your old pal Dr. Mality had to crawl through many fetid graveyards and crusty catacombs before finally scoring this debut disc from Tombstones. Finally, after digging furiously through the moldy dirt, I have "Not For the Squeamish" and as you fiends might surmise, it's yet another offering of cartoony horror metal from the Razorback Records Horror Hive.

What makes this pustulent platter a little more appetizing than other recent Razorback releases, many of which have started to sound wearily familiar, is the sheer ghoulish quality behind it. Not only that, but in the tradition of the gory EC Comics of old, almost every tune is lovingly introduced by our "host", a cackling creep who delights in putrid puns and detailed descriptions of the horrors to follow. How could a degenerate such as myself resist such crawly delight?

All that would be nothing without the music to back it up and Tombstones is (de)composed of some of the most experienced evil-doers in the metal world. It's hard to dig up a more authentic horror metal vocalist than Stevo, the original rotting voice behind Impetigo. He vomits forth an amazing variety of twisted vocalizations throughout the album. The destructive chainsaw guitar sound is emitted by Prof. Patrick Bruss of Crypticus fame and the ripping tones he conjures here will delight all fans of early Swedish DM. Drums of doom are provided by the extremely active Elektrocutioner, best known for murdering the skins in Decrepitath. These are three freaks whose crud-entials cannot be questioned.

The music is nothing revolutionary, but it's catchy, crushing and ripping death metal to satisfy any who like it raw. It sounds just that wee bit more gruesome than other recent Razorback Records, which are kind of becoming cookie cutter. Credit Stevo's hideous howls and Patrick's grisly guitar sound for that. Song titles are right out of EC Comics' hall of fame: "Shriek Well Before Dying", " A Grave Undertaking" and "Re-ORGAN-ized".

Take it from me, a fiend who knows his stuff: Tombstones is pure sinister fun!