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posted Jul 3, 2013, 9:35 PM by Mike Korn   [ updated Jul 3, 2013, 9:35 PM ]
BREAKING NEWS!  It has been established that persons who have recently died have been returning to life and congregating in circle pits.  A widespread investigation of funeral homes, morgues and hospitals has concluded that the unburied dead have been returning to life and engaging in moshing, headbanging and other forms of thrash-inspired mayhem. It's hard for us to be reporting this to you but it does seem to be a fact. The origin of this plague of moshing zombies seems to originate in Sweden, with a long-running band known as FKU, which stands for FREDDY KRUGER'S UNDERWEAR. Recently our fearless reporter DR. ABNER MALITY ventured into the depths of territory controlled by these undead fiends and spoke to bassist/ghoul PAT SPLAT about the horrors of FKU's long, strange reign of terror. He returned with a chilling tale, which you can read HERE. To prepare yourself for this, it is recommended you listen to FKU's newest album "IV: Rise of the Mosh Mongers". And then get ready to thrash like a maniac!!!
Back in the land of the living, things are still pretty dire, as this extra dark and brutal edition of the Torture Chamber demonstrates...
AMORPHIS                                      "Circle"
NOISEM                                          "Agony Defined"
ENTRAILS                                       "Raging Death"
POWER TRIP                                   "Manifest Decimation"
DEATHCHAIN                                  "Ritual Death Metal"
CHURCH OF MISERY                        "Thy Kingdom Scum"